1/29/08

Dear Mitt Romney,
Asia is not a country.
Respectfully,
Chris

1/18/08

happy.

1 year of living with you both, and another year of seeing each of you every day. 2 years of helping you any time you needed it. 2 years of you helping you. no fight. no reason. no excuse for being too afraid to turn your head to say hi when we're standing side by side.
What does that say about you?

2 years of being your best friend. 2 years of holding you whenever you cried. 2 years of secrets, inside jokes, drunken debauchery, and sharing our most private thoughts. All that wiped away when you walked away never to come back. Now you refuse to be at the same party as me. Now you hide whenever you see me. Now you've replaced me for you and everyone else. Now you don't care at all about hurting me.
And you judge me.

if it were up to any of you i'd be dead. or kicked of of school. or crying on my bed in the fetal position.
Thank God it isn't up to you.

Yes I judge you. And for once I can say it. I am angry. It is unfair, immature, and morally reprehensible. You've made your choice. I don't respect it. And it shows me who you really are.

Happiness is not a choice. Maybe one day you'll figure that out or have to learn it the hard way. Or maybe you'll live your life less of a person, in judgement the very people who most need your help.

1/17/08

on life

life is hoping something is yet to come.

1/6/08

can't sleep

why can't i sleep?
why can't i control my thoughts?
why do i feel so light-headed?
why do i feel so...like i feel.
why do i care what they say/think?
why do my emotional/feeling states keep fluctuating so extremely across a matter of minutes?
why can't i just say the truth?
why am i punding?
why can't i get it out of my head?
what do i do about everything?
why do i feel like this?
what can be done?
why can't i sleep?
how can i sleep knowing tomorrow i'll wake up but nothing will be better.
no solutions will be discovered. no miracle had.