Enrique Iglesias - Away (Dave Audé Edit)

A video remix for Enrique Iglesias - Away (Dave Audé Edit).

Britney Spears - Womanizer (Kaskade Radio Edit)

Reach Out (Joe Bermudez & Chico Radio Edit)

A video remix of Hilary Duff - Reach out for the Joe Bermudez & Chico Radio Edit (without The Prophet's rap).

Poker Face (Dave Aude Radio Edit)

A video remix for Lady Gaga - Poker Face to the Dave Aude Radio Edit.

Hot n Cold (Jason Nevins Short Mix)

A video remix for Katy Perry - Hot n Cold to the Jason Nevins Short Mix.

Girls Aloud - Can't Speak French (Tony Lamezma Radio Edit)

Confession of a Pyrophobe

I am afraid of lighting candles or incense because I don't trust myself enough to not start a fire. I am afraid of burning myself. I am also afraid of setting off fire alarms.

I love candles though... But I do hate pretty candles melting and dying. That makes me sad.

This is why the fake candles are amazing to me. Also, when I burn real candles I am never alone and don't light them myself...

Logo

Love Lockdown (Brad Walsh Remix)

September - Cry For You [Jackal Remix, Short]

P!nk - So What [Bimbo Jones Radio Edit]

Sneakernight - Vanessa Hudgens (A Castillo Radio Edit)

Reporting Iraq - Book Review

Reporting Iraq: An Oral History of the War by the Journalists Who Covered It by Columbia Journalism Review

My review

rating: 5 of 5 stars
I really enjoyed this book! It gave a powerful first-hand perspective of the war in Iraq. Very interesting to read, gripping, informative. Amazing!


View all my reviews.

Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me) Review

Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts by Carol Tavris

My review

rating: 4 of 5 stars
Great book. Well written. Exposes the self-justification drive and cognitive dissonance. The challenge will be translating that into the "real" world... Overall I felt the books had a few biases and tunnel vision on issues (for me these areas were easy to see/understand and did not significantly detract from those passages resonance).


View all my reviews.

Give it 2 Me (Paul Oakenfold Short) Video Remix!

Neoeugenics

Paying (poor) people to have a tubal ligation ("tubes tied") / vasectomy?

Is this neoeugenics? What are the ethical issues this entails? Why not invest money into other less destructive solutions? Could a minor's guardian get their child sterilized and make the profit? What kind of doctors would perform the surgery under such conditions?

I feel if an individual wants to be sterilized on their own accord they should certainly have the right, but paying people in dire economic straights to have such procedures ammounts to excessive coercion and is unethical. Invest the money into education. Invest it in empowering people to have control over their reproductive futures and make informed decisions without external pressures. Do not bribe or blackmail people into having a (generally) irreversible operation. Such actions are closer to fascist eugenics than democratic freedom.

Prejudices and the Economy

"...in the nineteenth-century American West, Chinese immigrants were hired to work in the gold mines, potentially taking jobs from white laborers. The white-run newspapers fomented prejudice against them, describing the Chinese as "depraved and vicious," "gross gluttons," "bloodthirsty and inhuman." Yet only a decade later, when the Chinese were willing to accept the dangerous, arduous work of building the transcontinental railroad--work that white laborers were unwilling to undertake--public prejudice toward them subsided, replaced by the opinion that the Chinese were sober, industrious, and law-abiding. "They are equal to the best white men," said the railroad tycoon Charles Crocker. "They are very trusty, very intelligent and they live up to their contracts." After the completion of the railroad, jobs again became scarce, and the end of the Civil War brought an influx of war veterans into an already tight job market. Anti-Chinese prejudice returned, with the press now describing the Chinese as "criminal," "conniving," "crafty," and "stupid." "

From Mistakes Were Made (but not by me) - Tavris and Aronson, 64


For me this connects with the growing intolerance for 'illegal immigrants', 'undocumented workers,' or whatever you want to call them. Although often the intolerance expressed IS based in racism, more generally the "in group" consists of Americans and the "others" are foreigners... ('those foreigners coming in and stealing American jobs'). I think as the economy continues to struggle more and more prejudices will emerge. I can easily see the prejudices spreading beyond racial/immigration issues and into other issues. Laws prohibiting employment discrimination based on especially sexual orientation have been controversial (to differing degrees depending on the local cultural climate) throughout America. As unemployment rates rise I would not be surprised if people are more accepting of such discrimination (even to other protected classes such as those with disabilities). Also the realm of how much an employer can control the lives of their employees outside of work is in flux. Already some employers refuse to higher smokers (even if they do not smoke on the job). This practice I believe has been accepted (or at least overlooked) partly because of the restriction in the economy. Non-smokers aren't as likely to express dissension with an employment practice that excludes smokers if it gives them an edge up especially in our current job market. In fact it is in their self-interest to justify and even support such policies.

Just Dance!!!

Here's a video remix I made of Lady Gaga - Just Dance for the Trevor Simpson Radio Edit.

When I Grow Up (Dave Audé Radio Edit)

Here's a video remix I made of The Pussycat Dolls - When I Grow Up for the Dave Audé Radio Edit.

When You Were Young (Jacques Lu Cont)

Here's a video remix I put together of The Killers - When You Were Young for the Jacque Lu Cont edit.

Knock Knock Lovers

Sister's Visit

My sister visited this weekend. Our conversations were very deep indeed.

JetHawks

Watching the jethawks baseball game and figuring how to track the score card (well trying to with the help of sister) really made me wanna catch more Padres games...

Slippery Slopes

The "Slippery Slope" argument is a logical fallacy made by people who most often have no sound reasoned basis for the argument. It is based in fear and ignorance. It fails to focus on the issue at hand in favor of a "parade of horribles" which may or may not be linked to the issue at hand. If one wants to effectively argue an issue... steer clear of the slippery slope argument in favor of more sound topics/logical deductions.

To further exemplify the mistakes of making "slippery slope" arguments, here are potential such arguments that could (and might have been made) in the past.
"If the Government can't require people to attend church and respect the Sabbath then people will lose all morality."
"If women can vote pretty soon children and resident aliens will be given the ability to vote."
"If interracial marriage is approved soon people will be able to marry animals or children."

Restricting individuals' rights based on such poor logic is reckless and unjust.

Moreover if the controversial action is seen as "downhill" and moving towards some horrible outcome then why not push back "uphill"... Like arrange marriages to prevent that pesky issue of "love" between people of different races or the same sex... or preventing enlisted individuals from discussing anything in their personal lives - from their religion and political beliefs to their hometown or sexual orientation to keep troops morale high... Those are just two outrageous examples.

Confessions of a C-SPANer

I am one of the very few people in the world who can often find myself riveted to c-span... Here are just a few reasons...

• The political process is a very strange (and often frustrating) American experience which CSPAN offers a unique glimpse into.
• Observing debates by our lawmakers provides insight into the issues themselves
  
• The people who study politics and global relations are extraordinarily fascinating
• Conventions and speeches are dominated by discourse on their own specific ideological band (unique to the convention/speech event).
  
• CSPAN often helps to minimize so-called "bias" because often it offers unmediated (immediate) events.
• It provides endless amusement hearing callers complain about the "liberal bias" in "the media" but praise the "neutrality of Fox News Channel" juxtaposed with hearing other callers bash Fox News Channel's "blatant partisanism".
  

A Very Sixth Graduation

A mixtape for the Sixth College students 04-08/9 (especially fratority 709)...

1. Sixth College Dance Mix - Sixth College Unolympics 2004
2. I'll be There for You - The Rembrandts
3. Whites Houses - Vanessa Carlton
4. Out Tonight - Rent (Film Soundtrack)
5. Trouble with Boys - Loreta
6. Seasons of Love - Rent (Film Soundtrack)
7. The Trouble With Love Is - Kelly Clarkson
8. Cavanaugh Park - Something Corporate
9. Crash and Burn - Savage Garden
10. I Hope You Dance - Lee Ann Womack
11. Home - Vanessa Carlton
12. Finale B - Rent (Film Soundtrack)
13. Who Knew - Pink
14. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) - Green Day
15. What I Did for Love - A Chorus Line (Original Broadway Soundtrack)
16. For Good - Wicked (Original Broadway Soundtrack)
17. I Will Remember You - Sarah McLachlan
18. Graduation (Friends Forever) - Vitamin C
19. Breakaway - Kelly Clarkson
20. Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield
    

"Gay Marriage"

Civil Unions Vs. Marriage

"Separate but Equal" version 2.0
Quite possibly a necessary first step though...

If marriage is a religious institution why does the government have a hand in it? They are not allowed to manage the establishment of religion...or interfere with the free exercise of it? If people believe that same-gender/sex marriage is a religious freedom (as some do), why can the state discriminate between two religions/religious institutions by recognizing one ("heterosexual marriage") but not the other ("homosexual marriage")?

Light up the Sky

I'll be the blue eyed lightning bolt to your brown eyed thunderstorm 'cause when I'm around you baby I swear I could light up the sky!

Fashion Forward

Simple Response to Kirby Wilbur's Speech

Kirby Wilbur
Young America's Foundation
National Conservative Student Counsel
On the Separation of Church and State: Government & Religion

The historical documents he refers to are all well and good, but not legally binding nor constitutional. They are peoples' opinions expressed in accordance to principles of individuals' rights and liberties.

And no, the words “separation of church and state” are not in the constitution, but the constitution does say the congress cannot legislate the establishment of religion nor limit the liberties of people to freely exercise their religion. If the government cannot legislate for religion nor against (any) individuals' religion. That to me seems a clear divorcement of religion from government.

Wilbur's argument that there is no morality outside of religion is absurd. Religions establish their own morals. Morality varies from one religion to another and from one denomination to another. Morality based on inalienable individual rights and liberties is the constitutionally based. This morality includes not legislating for religion or against individuals' religion.

Wilbur claims students can't pray in schools. Students are allowed to pray on their own accord in public schools provided they do not disrupt the studies.

Wilbur claims there is a universal and unchanging truth on which the constitution and the United States is based on. The constitution allows for changes made to it and to our nation because the founders knew they did not know an absolute Truth. The changes made in regards to divorcing the church from the state is based upon the original Bill of Rights as expanded by the Fourteenth Amendment. Rejecting the changes based upon clinging to historical and antiquated opinions is retrospective and contraindicated by the constitution.

Aim For the Stars

Fortune Cookie Fun

My sister and brother and I used to come up with funny fortune cookie possibilities. My sister still does. And now I still do too...


Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

I've got nothing!

Open up my cookie, baby... oh, hey!

I’m Free at Last!

Expect the Spanish Inquisition.

That wasn't chicken...

Just say no to nylon.

A smile shows you like someone... To an extent

it is time for.... SPONTANEOUS FUN!!!!

Beware of aisle 22

you should have had a burger...

crack is whack

Just Dance!

Adam and me in the club... Never happened, but It's probably possible knowing us.

To Who?

Blind Spot

Realizing not everyone was as nerdy as my family has been a strange process...

Follow Your Dreams

Follow Your Dreams!

Chuck Norris Vs. David Hasselhoff

Someday (i'll take it back to me)

someday i'll be big enough to comprehend the curve that you've thrown at me
someday i'll stand up strong and fix my life (and save it) from myself
someday i'll be so overjoyed to see you, i'll forget how you've hurt me
someday i'll end my quest for someone that i love as much as they love me
someday i'll look back and wish i'd have loved myself as much as i loved them
someday i'll be free, unfettered by others, not blaming them for what's wrong
someday i'll stop looking outside myself and instead look at my own self
someday i'll not the value that i posess, and not sell myself out short
someday i'll stop changing myself to be what others would like me to be
someday i'll rejoin the path again, sad that i lost myself when i did
someday i'll hold my own self dear and i won't let you get me down at all
someday i'll get the guts to say "no" and not be selfless at my expense
someday i'll be greatful for what i've been given and not still ask for more
someday i'll depart from here but only to return myself yet again
someday it will sing in, you only wanted what you that was best for me
someday my hands will really be washed clean of all of this mess i have made
someday i'll find a way to live in the moment, not lost in tommorrow
someday i'll stop caring about what they all think and say about me
someday i'll know who i'm not and who i am, and i won't look back on it
someday i'll be self-sufficient and i won't be self-conscious to a fault
someday i won't need someone to always have to call me on all my shit
some day i will take back the powers others have to make me feel ungood
some day i won't abandon myself or forget about me, replaced with you
someday i'll find the strength and the will to fix myself and all i've done wrong
someday i'll grow up and finally find myself

A Farewell to Amor

train tracks to rise above and move against
and fight to break the mold
you weren't even that deserving
you're not even the cure
and you wonder why you even bother getting up in the morning
if you only could be here right now
looking up towards the glowing satellite
these walls of turmoil
these halls of white
and being stuck in a losing streak
where all you can do is grit your teeth
and pretend to smile
so you say you want to close the book with me
all you have to do is shut my cover
because you gave up ages ago
to be honest
i did the best i could to cover your hurt
but you wanted the melodrama
and you wanted the spotlight
but you were never a god to me
even though half of the world thought you were (at least in your eyes)
but what you didn't see is what you were honestly missing
the better parts of me
the parts that made everything right
so yeah, correct
we ended without a blow
but that doesn't really make a difference
because i know better than to fight
when we'll be gone for good in a week
and i wish you luck
but next time we meet
hopefully you will have grown up and seen
the rest me that you never saw
or maybe you hope we never meet
so you can just stop caring about me
because to be honest, my priorities are in order
and its hard to pencil you in
when you keep disappearing
and we're friends and then we're enemies every two weeks
but good luck, you're right
maybe its best to end it here
because at least we can both sleep at night
knowing we've said the things we didn't want to hear
or that in our minds we both "won the fight"
how childish of us
that we could never see
that both of us were infantile
and that we were never meant to be.
hopefully.
i will grow up too, and learn to get over the worst parts of you.

Curtain Call

if my shadow must exist for your open arms to blow
then let it be for my world to break free
or if my life has gone away
let me live without myself.

you've treated me so good how could you say you did me wrong
you're still in heartbreak mode and you deserve to know
that at least you lived it well
the split second that you had
on stage for the whole world to see
and believe me, i know they're watching

my life should be as one breaks his toys
i've been made to be broken and the whole world's a stage
and now the crowd is cheering me now
cause at least i played it well.

one more glance through the dim faces of the house
i find my fears are met with truth
in their eyes i find a mirror of a thousand little shards
showing me the broken toys were my life,
my friends,
my heart

A Lifetime Of Minutes and Stories

fixed on my head like a thorn in my side,
my tongue stretches words in the edge of my crown.
i am beautiful for my waiting on you.
don't you dare let me fall from this cliff i'm hanging from.
Chandelier sway light meets the water in my eyes.
plethora of spiders hanging cobwebs from the years.
i say i'm giving up on you,
you are taking too much of my patience and effort.
and what hurts me worse is that you'll never understand how unfair you're being to me.
you'll never understand the endless hours of misery i've suffered.
if i had a lifetime of minutes and stories to give you,
my glands would swell up and fill my mouth with blood.
do you know how many minutes you've taken off my life,
from so much energy i've taken worrying over you?
don't let these words go to your head, just because i wrote it about you.

Childhood

I guess I wrote this 2001

Cotton candy, baseball games,
Getting bigger, growing pains,
Running fast, walking slow,
Tripping, falling, a stubbed toe.
Making faces, crossing eyes,
Building blocks and bow ties.
First-day-of-school, brand new clothes,
Running ‘round the sprinkler hose.
Soft cool grass, hard hot cement,
Basketball, new hockey net.
California, Texas too,
Oklahoma, a house that’s new.
Little turtle, brand new dog,
Pet tadpole to a little frog.
Silly stories, a sore thumb,
Brand new candy, Chewing gum.
Meeting people, making friends,
Soft sand pits and jungle gyms.
Monkey bars, and swing sets too,
Dull scissors, and stinky glue.
Desks so big, chairs so small,
‘More cake now, I ate it all.’
‘Watch your mouth, don’t be rude!’
Lunch to talk, and eat some food,
Homework, tests, science fair,
Pulling, combing, and cutting hair.
Musicals, and class plays too,
Big service and Sunday school.
Falling down, a bumped head,
Now it’s time to go to bed.
Water fights, swimming pool
Hot summer days, snow so cool.
Christmas tree, pumpkin patch,
Let’s go out and play some catch.
Running wild, stuck in class,
Racing bikes down hills so fast.
Forest journey’s, getting lost,
Getting gifts, no matter the cost.
Dinosaurs, airplanes,
Lego sets, brand new games.
Toys R Us, Chucky Cheese,
Casa Benita,
Birthday cake
Climing a tree
Stung by a bee

What Am I?

I wrote this in 2001 so 9th grade I wanna say

I flow like a river,
I pass like a song.
I give you more,
But you are never satisfied.
I can do anything:
Bring you life, happiness, or wealth,
Death, misery, sadness, or pain.
I change your life.
I know what tomorrow brings,
Where today goes,
I change your life.
And why yesterday came.
I bring you the future.
I brought you the past.
I’m holding today,
What am I?

Never Together?

it's been years since someone wrote this to me...but it still stings.

"just remember, that i will ALWAYS be higher above you, no matter how fucking smart you think you are...i will always be better than you, because i have it together way more than you will ever fucking have."

have i never had it together? do i still not? who really knows i guess!

From Mrs. Heasley's class, 2002

Throughout history convictions and beliefs have guided human actions. Such beliefs originate from a wide variety of sources that vary between individuals and communities and include innate tendencies, personal experiences, religious ideals, government decrees and social norms instilled through the media, schools and social interactions. Often one source of conviction prevails over the others, via social pressures, government impositions, a “religious” sense of right, or the individual’s sense of fairness. A person generally comes to accept his beliefs in one of three ways: blind acceptance without justification, acceptance with presumed justification but without analysis thereof, or acceptance with analyzed justification. George Orwell’s novel, 1984, follows the influence of these various pressures on the individual, illustrating how a government seeks to dominate the beliefs of individuals by forcing acceptance without rationale, and thereby producing a book that is highly relevant in the modern world as individuals choose either to struggle against or to accept ideas based on the various influences.

No Hands!

Snail Tales!

Choose Your Own Adventure

Job Search: Day 122

one day...

EXACTLY!

Embedded Video

SRFCP Video

Student-Run Free Clinic Project video presentation I made last quarter.

I have a feeling.

I feel like an emotional train wreck.
I feel like a sideshow for others' amusement.
I feel all 'scary and damaged.'
I feel like a firefly that's run out of light.
I feel like a fire gone to ashes.
I feel forgettable.
I feel.

I have a feeling.

SERIOUSLY?
SERIOUSLY?!
SERIOUSLY?!?

Loving or hating.
All the blood in my veins.
Shifting accuracy, small and hat-ed.
Small and weakling.
Small and small.
This version of all truth.
Ever forgetable. Ever the one of many.
Exhaustive self
Can't be loved, can't be saved.
Still easily forgotten.
wear the crown of thoughts.
thoughts of emptiness
of loneliness.
Forty years yet.
Maybe not.
Maybe forgiveness has a way of setting free.
Labeling, condemning, fingers pointed at all.
at me.
hypersensitivity's the cost
and the price.
Indelibility.

Love is...

Love is an addiction.
Upon cessation an individual goes through a withdrawal syndrome which varies in intensity, duration, and symptoms from person to person.
Addictions are powerful motives in human life.
Dependencies claim action.
Love is powerful. Love is synaptic firings.
Addicts go to extremes to fulfill their Dependencies.
Love is classical conditioning - The other's face / their scent / their touch / their voice / even their taste - is all encoded and conditioned with positive mood states and positive affects.
Love withdrawal syndrome is likely informed by reverse conditioning.
Love can be a maladaptive pattern of learning.
Love is habituation.
Love is emotional.
Love is mood.
Love is in essence a drug.
Love is in large part unconscious.
Love is more than just a feeling.
Love is more than what one perceives.
Love is a chemical process within the brain.
Still, Love can be so much more.

Singing

We all sing along to the the tune of tomorrow until we forget just how it goes.

On War

War is a symptom - not a means or an end.

Really

Here we sit and think on tomorrow
Know we've lost our rapture in full, today
Pull the hope from our memoriums
and give a chance to those without.
Defy the world to write us off as idealistic wunder ones.
Even truth out, for the future - it's all real.
The here the now is all the world we'll know.
Real life has begin, so just jump in.
Just let go.

Dear Mitt Romney,
Asia is not a country.
Respectfully,
Chris

happy.

1 year of living with you both, and another year of seeing each of you every day. 2 years of helping you any time you needed it. 2 years of you helping you. no fight. no reason. no excuse for being too afraid to turn your head to say hi when we're standing side by side.
What does that say about you?

2 years of being your best friend. 2 years of holding you whenever you cried. 2 years of secrets, inside jokes, drunken debauchery, and sharing our most private thoughts. All that wiped away when you walked away never to come back. Now you refuse to be at the same party as me. Now you hide whenever you see me. Now you've replaced me for you and everyone else. Now you don't care at all about hurting me.
And you judge me.

if it were up to any of you i'd be dead. or kicked of of school. or crying on my bed in the fetal position.
Thank God it isn't up to you.

Yes I judge you. And for once I can say it. I am angry. It is unfair, immature, and morally reprehensible. You've made your choice. I don't respect it. And it shows me who you really are.

Happiness is not a choice. Maybe one day you'll figure that out or have to learn it the hard way. Or maybe you'll live your life less of a person, in judgement the very people who most need your help.

on life

life is hoping something is yet to come.

can't sleep

why can't i sleep?
why can't i control my thoughts?
why do i feel so light-headed?
why do i feel so...like i feel.
why do i care what they say/think?
why do my emotional/feeling states keep fluctuating so extremely across a matter of minutes?
why can't i just say the truth?
why am i punding?
why can't i get it out of my head?
what do i do about everything?
why do i feel like this?
what can be done?
why can't i sleep?
how can i sleep knowing tomorrow i'll wake up but nothing will be better.
no solutions will be discovered. no miracle had.